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Fifty Shades of Beatles Bible
30 June 2014
7.30pm
thisbirdhasflown
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FYI I once had a girl, or should i say she once had me?

By hook or by crook, I'll be last in this book.

3 July 2014
7.08pm
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Zig
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50 paulImage Enlarger

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Bulldog, Ahhh Girl

To the fountain of perpetual mirth, let it roll for all its worth. And all the children boogie.

3 July 2014
8.51pm
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Ahhh Girl
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Zig said

50 paulImage Enlarger

Is it a pop-up book? Or one of those that has tactile (feel-y) things on pages throughout the book? Or sound clips, like those breathing parts in Lovely Rita and Kreen-Akrore?

or all three? I better stop.

a-hard-days-night-paul-7a-hard-days-night-ringo-6a-hard-days-night-paul-7

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Bulldog, Mr. Kite
3 July 2014
10.05pm
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Mr. Kite
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@Ahhh Girl I found an article on the upcoming release!
It’s a real book! All I did was look it up!

From YouCantPossiblyFathomHowHuchILovePaulMcCartney.com
Staff Writer: Mary Meepawl

I just got an exclusive story on the new book Fifty Shades of McCartney! I know you’ve all been eagerly awaiting details!

Written by Iluh VePal, the book is fiction based on the sexiest stories (wink wink nudge nudge ladies) found in Linda’s old diaries and told to the author by Paul’s current wife Nancy (there’s even a rumour that Jane Asher has finally given some stories up about Paul, but that’s unconfirmed). It is a fairly long book ranging from Paul’s early years (either from Linda’s earliest stories or Jane’s if she was a part of the book’s creation) to Paul’s 71st birthday. The author creates vivid mental images of the scenes and is aided by pictures taken by Linda (and a few others) over the years.

VePal’s publishing agency BeatSmut Inc. will even be releasing a Special Edition including the much talked about pop-up section and sound clips! The pop-ups contain to-scale facsimiles of certain book scenes and the sounds are taken from some of Paul’s most vocally challenging songs and “home demo tapes.” Sadly, the other rumored life-size cut outs, tactile book page objects, and DVD will not be included with the release. Although luckily the DVD will be made and is for sale separately!

So tell me in the comments what you think! Will you be getting the Sexy Special Edition? Anyone on my site probably is, but thought I’d ask anyway.
For any guys who’ve made it all the way through, although I can’t confirm any of Jane’s stories are in the book, I can tell you there is at least one very racey picture including her! (;

For those of you (all of you) interested, you can pre-order the book here!

If you get it you’ll have to share that racey photo mentioned at the end! a-hard-days-night-george-10

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Bulldog

If I spoke prose you'd all find out, I don't know what I talk about.

Can buy Joe love!
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3 July 2014
10.16pm
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Von Bontee
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“Caught the early plane back to London, 50 shades of grey in a sack”

“She tells Max to stay when the class has gone away, so he waits behind, writing “50 Shades of Grey”

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Mr. Kite, Bulldog

Paul: Yeah well… first of all, we’re bringing out a ‘Stamp Out Detroit’ campaign.

         

3 July 2014
11.12pm
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Ahhh Girl
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@Mr. Kite

A girl can hope for a really pleasing picture when she reads lusciously written prose like that and sees a tantalizing link.

@Von Bontee, that sounds much more promising than 50 acorns!

3 July 2014
11.46pm
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Mr. Kite
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@Ahhh Girl stated slightly disappointed

@Mr. Kite

A girl can hope for a really pleasing picture when she reads lusciously written prose like that and sees a tantalizing link.

@Von Bontee, that sounds much more promising than 50 acorns!

But you’d expect that! I’ve got to keep you on your toes!

Fine, as an apology:
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And since I mentioned Jane:
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Ahhh Girl

If I spoke prose you'd all find out, I don't know what I talk about.

Can buy Joe love!
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4 July 2014
3.13am
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Mr. Kite
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Since the forum women (mostly AG) have all these ‘sexy Beatle pics’ (mostly Paul) posted here, I thought I’d start a guys section of the 50 Shades Of Beatles Bible topic. 

There’s nothing bad/spoilable in the spoiler (unless hot Beatle-wives/girlfriends are bad) I just put it there as the pictures will take up lots of space to scroll by.

I must warn you I’ve added Ahhh Girl inspired commentary. I feel if she was me this is what I would say:


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Yum!

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Pattie has me drooling already!

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Linda lookin’ cute fixin’ her camera.

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A GIF! I thought it was just a picture, this is so much better!!

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La-la-la, la-la the lovely Liinderr

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Still drooling!

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Lucky George! 

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Lucky grass…

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Did I already say yum?

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SOO MUCH DROOL!

What do you mean they’re mostly Pattie Boyd?

I hadn’t noticed…

Guys need to contribute to this! I’m tired of shirtless Paul (although I know AG isn’t! [and it seems I’ve fueled that fire if you consult the above post]).

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SgtPeppersBulldog

If I spoke prose you'd all find out, I don't know what I talk about.

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4 July 2014
3.22am
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WETSRoosa
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linda-mccartney.jpgImage Enlarger

I’ve never been a huge Linda guy, but I do like the sleepy-eyed look Linda gives off here.

My pick would be May Pang, even if she was WAY too skinny back in the day…

mayslide8.jpgImage Enlarger

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"There's no such thing as bad student... only bad teacher."

4 July 2014
3.34am
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Ahhh Girl
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You’re getting there with the commentary, @Mr. Kite. I think you can kick it up a notch next time. I believe in you, and those ladies deserve lots of praise. And check your inbox.

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Mr. Kite
4 July 2014
3.43am
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Mr. Kite
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@WETSRoosa I’m obviously a Pattie guy and don’t think Linda’s the best looking of the girls, but still think she’s an attractive woman.

@Ahhh Girl Didn’t get a PM. And I know it was a bit weak, but it’s a public forum I need to hold back!

If I spoke prose you'd all find out, I don't know what I talk about.

Can buy Joe love!
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4 July 2014
4.48am
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Ahhh Girl
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Mr. Kite said

@Ahhh Girl Didn’t get a PM. And I know it was a bit weak, but it’s a public forum I need to hold back!

Um, are you saying I need to dial it down a shade or two (or 49)? a-hard-days-night-ringo-4a-hard-days-night-george-4a-hard-days-night-paul-7

I hope not.

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Mr. Kite
4 July 2014
5.09am
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Mr. Kite
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Ahhh Girl said

Mr. Kite said

@Ahhh Girl Didn’t get a PM. And I know it was a bit weak, but it’s a public forum I need to hold back!

Um, are you saying I need to dial it down a shade or two (or 49)? a-hard-days-night-ringo-4a-hard-days-night-george-4a-hard-days-night-paul-7

I hope not.

You don’t, but I would need years of training to get to your level… Although a few more pictures of Pattie like that may speed up my learning curve. a-hard-days-night-george-10

If I spoke prose you'd all find out, I don't know what I talk about.

Can buy Joe love!
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4 July 2014
2.38pm
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WETSRoosa
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@mrkite For me, I’d take Jane over Linda, but I’m a sucker for redheads; heck, I married one. And as a guy who’s always had a thing for Asian women, I’ve always found May in her younger days hot, if alarmingly skinny. 

"There's no such thing as bad student... only bad teacher."

4 July 2014
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@Mr. Kite

Lay down all thoughts / Surrender to the Boyd

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4 July 2014
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WETSRoosa said

@mrkite For me, I’d take Jane over Linda, but I’m a sucker for redheads; heck, I married one. And as a guy who’s always had a thing for Asian women, I’ve always found May in her younger days hot, if alarmingly skinny. 

I agree!

Ahhh Girl said

@Mr. Kite

Lay down all thoughts / Surrender to the Boyd

Gladly!!

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Ahhh Girl

If I spoke prose you'd all find out, I don't know what I talk about.

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5 July 2014
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Mr. Kite
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How did I not add Barbara? She was a Bond girl!

Image Enlarger

If I spoke prose you'd all find out, I don't know what I talk about.

Can buy Joe love!
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5 July 2014
2.51pm
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Ahhh Girl
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While in the shower just now, I was listening to Paul’s NEW album. I looked at my mp3 player through the clear glass shower door and imagined Paul stepping out of the mp3 player and into the shower with me. I shall have to do this imagining thing again…and again…and again. a-hard-days-night-paul-7

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Neely
5 July 2014
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Mr. Kite
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Yes, imagination is a great thing!

If I spoke prose you'd all find out, I don't know what I talk about.

Can buy Joe love!
If you're shopping at one of these two websites use the links below to support the Beatles Bible:

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6 July 2014
4.13pm
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Mr. Kite
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I’m trying to step up my commentary as AG suggested, but I don’t know if I’m gonna succeed.

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Could that have been a little tighter? a-hard-days-night-george-10

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Her hair is perfect!

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Hmm… What an odd question you ask, but I guess if I could be any article of clothing I’d be… Those tights a-hard-days-night-paul-7, next question please!

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Found this on tumblr with this caption:
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Need I say more…a-hard-days-night-george-10a-hard-days-night-george-10a-hard-days-night-george-10

I hope not! I will not stoop to AG’s level… a-hard-days-night-ringo-15 At least not anywhere other than my mind.

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What?! Another one of those questions… Well I guess if I could be any piece of furniture it’d be… That chair. No particular reason. a-hard-days-night-john-6

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Could she be any sexier?! a-hard-days-night-john-4

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YES! Oh the legs! ahdn_paul_02a-hard-days-night-john-3

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…I’d be the grass! Yes, in a heartbeat! Now no. More. Stupid. Questions….

But really being under her there— stop Kite! a-hard-days-night-paul-7a-hard-days-night-george-9

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I found Waldo… Sexy… Waldo?
a-hard-days-night-ringo-6paul-mccartneya-hard-days-night-ringo-14brian-epstein

Nope!! I’ve failed the commentary test! Never again will I commentate.
That was quite horrible, I feel bad for anyone who read it! I do not have your commentary skills, @Ahhh Girl!

From now on I will only post the postures, no comments!

And where can I find that holy water that’s always falling on AG?

If I spoke prose you'd all find out, I don't know what I talk about.

Can buy Joe love!
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